I’ve had a long-standing beef with World of Warcraft. It hasn’t been about the treatment of Paladins in Vanilla, or the fact that Shaman patch notes still rarely exceed 4 lines (but man, talk about some sweet new icons,) or even never getting an original Amani War Bear after 25+ runs.
It’s the trolls.
I’m not talking about the guys that link Thunderfury in trade chat or the chittering horde of idiots on the forums. I’m talking about the actual in-game race of heavily accented island dwelling cannibals who are so-not-at-all a play on an outdated stereotype. The postcolonial student in me shudders at the thought of hearing yet another ‘ja man!’ or ‘we be Zanadalari!’
The thing is, they just won’t go away. I know they’re one of the official races, but it seems like every time I start to forget about them they creep into another massive plotline. Every expansion there seems to be yet another troll themed instance, regardless of the tone or theme of the piece as a whole. Burning Crusade and the tragic story of Illidan Stormrage? ZUL’AMAN OUTTA NOWHERE. Wrath of the Lich King and the stone-cold killa’ Arthas? Zul’Drak and two troll themed instances: Drak’Tharon Keep and Gun’Drak. Then, come the great Cataclysm, the developers just had to bring back both Zul’Gurub and Zul’Aman, as if to make sure we didn’t forget that there are trolls and somebody on the design team is in love with them.
So when the Zandalari showed up to resurrect The Thunder King, I simply rolled my eyes. I watched on as they flooded into the ancient Mogu vaults, determined to stay current no matter the continent, regardless of how many of their leaders I’ve summarily slaughtered. Hakkar? I’ve killed him at two different level caps. I’ve had Zul’jin’s head in the bags of multiple characters, even alongside his pitiful replacement Daakara. I’m tired of re-enacting the famous swordfight from Raiders of the Lost Ark except with capoeira and Lava Burst.
Why couldn’t it be a fringe sect of the Forsaken who’s trying to resurrect Lei Shen, bringing back the mindless undead hordes of Naxxramas? What about another sect of Sha-touched Pandaren, similar to the situation with Taran Zhu, who don’t know what they’re doing but are simply following orders. I’d even take a factional bit where Garrosh (or Wrynn) is desperate to win the battle for Pandaria and summons a force they can’t control to do it. Hell, they could have Dalaran teleport over Pandaria and parachute in Kirin Tor mages and that’d be preferable to more damn trolls.
Am I alone in this, or are there others out there who are tired of being trolled by trolls?